It's been three years since I went on a date and before that 26 years. I'm just socially inept when it comes to guys I like. I'll spend hours talking to my friends about how I like them so much and debating if I should ask them out until the crush as passed or they found someone else. It wasn't until I got into online dating that I actually started going on dates. I think the security of being behind a computer screen makes it a little bit more comforting when it comes to talking to guys and I ended up going a few dates because of it and even had a relationship come out of it. But it was a complicated one at best. Partially due to my naivety of how romantic relationships work and wanting to make "us" work when looking back now, it was one that wouldn't have last. I remember one point in our relationship I should have known it wasn't going to last. He invited me to a wedding. While I enjoyed myself, there was a point in the reception where I wanted to go dance. But he didn't want to because doesn't dance at all. Not knowing anyone else there (it takes me a while to warm up to a room full of people I don't know), I ended up sitting at the table trying to put on a happy face but in reality I was sulking inside. Even if he had two left feet, him attempting to dance would have been nice, cute even. Heck I'm not the best dancer either. I mean I can be a hermit and to myself at times. But there are certain things I love to do, like dancing, karaoke, or going to the beach and it would be nice if my future significant other enjoyed those things too.
Which leads me to the events of last weekend and Monday. There's this guy at work that I've liked for a while and we would constantly talk about the books we've read, movies we watched, or his love of fishing and baseball (a sport I still don't understand. Heh.) There's something about him I really like, but I never did anything about it. Well, my work ended up having a get together on Saturday where we talked and danced for a while. I was also drunk enough where I would have either poured out my feelings and/or totally make out with him. Things happened outside of our control and I didn't do any of those things. But it got me thinking that I've liked him for far too long to not make the first move and ask him out. I also got the vibe that he might be interested in me too. Of course I was afraid if I asked and he said no that not only would it suck, it would also be a little awkward since we are co-workers. But I realized that I can't be afraid of rejection and it's better to ask then not ask at all. So on Monday, when I saw him at work I asked him out, well more like if he wanted to hang out. Naturally I was not smooth at all when asking him, in fact I was a little awkward. But he said yes and even suggested that we go see a movie. So fingers crossed that we'll get to hang out. I have no idea what will become of this, but it's exciting and nice to feel like this again.
